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Stop Trivializing the Pain of Others
by Malcolm Stokes

Pain and suffering are a part of life. No one escapes it. The Bible makes it clear that we will face trials, but it also gives us a charge, to bear one another’s burdens. That’s not optional, it’s a part of living out the faith we claim to walk in.

But we live in a time where people want to be seen, heard, and followed. Social media has given everyone a platform, and unfortunately, some have chosen to use that platform at the expense of others. We have become quick to speak on what someone is going through, but slow to pray, slow to comfort, and slow to listen. And what’s worse is that this mindset has crept into the Church.

Instead of helping someone heal, we end up dissecting their story. Instead of covering them in love, we talk about their situation behind their back. Sometimes it is done in the name of concern, but let’s be real, it’s gossip. It is not Christlike to speak on someone’s pain as if it is public information when it was never meant to be shared. And for some, it is not even about helping, it’s about feeling more important, more spiritual, or more right.

There have been moments when people’s private struggles, whether written down, shared in confidence, or simply visible in their body languagemwere turned into topics of conversation. Sometimes those moments happen in places that are supposed to be safe, like the Church. And when that happens, it can do serious damage.

Imagine if someone in that position did not have a strong relationship with God to help them see past the hurt. Imagine if they were new to the faith, or already holding on by a thread. One careless moment could be the very thing that pushes them away from community, from healing, and possibly even from God.

We have to do better.

The Church should never be the hardest place to be real. It should be the safest place to be broken. A place where wounds are treated with care, not talked about for entertainment. A place where people can bring their pain and not worry about it being passed around like it’s nothing.

Before you speak on what someone is going through, ask yourself, am I helping to carry this, or am I adding to the weight? Do I have permission to share this, or am I crossing a line? Am I being led by love, or am I just being nosy?

We are called to reflect Christ in how we treat people, especially in their most vulnerable moments. Bearing one another’s burdens means listening, praying, protecting, and showing grace. It means choosing compassion over curiosity.

So let’s create a culture in the Church where people feel safe to bring their whole selves. Let’s honor their pain instead of trivializing it. Let’s truly be a people who reflect the heart of Jesus